Day Five of the Ten Day Meme Thingy

Day One: Ten things you want to say to ten different people right now
Day Two: Nine things about yourself.
Day Three: Eight ways to win your heart.
Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot.
Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done.
Day Six: Five people who mean a lot (in no order whatsoever)
Day Seven: Four turn offs.
Day Eight: Three turn ons.
Day Nine: Two smileys that describe your life right now.
Day Ten: One confession

1. Bought a condo with my current Ex. In truth we should have known what we were feeling long time before and shouldn't have used getting a condo as a way to try and keep us together for a little bit longer/see if our relationship would strengthen because of it.

2. This one isn't wish I never done but... I wish I would have gotten something other than just an English degree in college. I mean it's not an overly useless degree but not overly useful either. I still have no clue though what my other degree or studies would have been :P

3. Sold my car. Although I'm glad I did at the time cause I couldn't afford it then but now I really wish I had it cause I really miss the freedom it provides even if it costs a lot of money.

4. Gone through a purge period in my life. When I was just getting to know myself kink wise I bought a few things and purged them a couple of times. I wish I never done that.

5. That one guy in Cincinnati when I was really lonely/horny (and nobody knows him or about him as it was a one night stand thing) >.> It was a weird and bad experience that I never ever want to remember or experience again.

6. I seriously can't think of another one right now.

In truth there's very little I would never want to do even with the things mentioned. I believe that everything I have done was something I was meant to do more as a learning experience for myself. If I never did even all the things above then I wouldn't have learned lessons from them (eg the reason why I never should have done it in the first place). Everyone has their regrets but I wouldn't trade them for the world because I would have never learned the lesson they provided.

The past and the present

I started reading through past posts because I thought a while back I had an infatuation with someone and posted a lot of it on LJ... But as I am reading through, I dunno, I don't feel like I'm the same person I was then.

I had some much energy it seems and now I feel depressed more often than not (especially now after just reading some of the posts).

I also didn't realize Jason and I had only been together Five years rather than Six. I still can't believe it was April when we broke up.

Anyway the reason I looked through these posts was to try and remember the last time I was overly infatuated by someone, and reading through those posts made me realize I need to calm down and just stop for a bit.

Years ago I had this same reaction and was completely crazy about my emotions, I looked through things and basically found out I was infatuated with someone. I had forgotten the term since then, maybe even really forgotten the feeling. Let me tell you it hits you hard like the first drop on a rollercoaster. There are ups and downs and twisted curves and you don't know when any of these are going to hit, but if you just relax you might enjoy yourself and not worry about what's ahead of you.

opefully if the person whom I'm infatuated with reads this he's not freaked out by my previous posts.

Tonight

Well it seemed the usual Monday Night Burgers tonight became a wash as snow started falling right after work and never stopped making the roads nearly undriveable and also Rogers Park Alderman having his Holiday Party with Special Guest Rahm Emanuel at our normal place. So the total came out to be four including myself. Since it was just the four of us though we decided we wanted Deep Dish Pizza instead so went to Girodano's. It was great. It's always cool to have an intimate group of friends hanging out sometimes. I think next week though going to start using an RSVP so I can get a good count of how many people are actually going to show up and who I need to tell when things change.